After smashing my sunglasses with my boney butt last week I went searching for my next boneheaded stunt, and proceeded to lock my ignition key on gym strap inside my truck, only to discover my spare key had gone missing.

No problem, I'll just call Farmers Roadside Assistance and a local outfit will come down and have me unlocked quickly. I'm writing this post with a purpose because I'm sending this link to my Farmers agent.

It was 1400 on a Friday afternoon and a Farmers computer bot started sending me messages every 10 minutes saying they were still looking for someone. At 1500 it said they found someone and they would be there at 1810. Cool, at 2000 I called the nice Farmers lady down in the Philippines and asked where the truck was and she said that due to privacy issues the tow truck driver was not allowed to contact me directly because he wanted to make sure I was still locked out before driving 45 minutes to get here, and bailed. There is so much wrong with that answer I'll just let it sit.

I said find somebody local for the next morning! She said ok and we said good night. Good thing I'm home and not out on the highway.

The next morning, it started all over again and the nearest they could find was 45 minutes away in Columbia. This time I looked the tow outfit up and called them. They couldn't figure out why they were being dispatched from so far away and they were going to charge me $150 because they didn't trust Farmers to reimburse them. I said cancel.

I ended up calling a local guy and he had me unlocked in a jiffy and charged me $40. So, this turned out to be a total fail of Farmers Roadside Assistance and I'm droping the receipt off with my agent this morning hoping to get reimbursed.

Update: My agent took care of everything, said it's just that local availability for services around here suck and that's out of Farmers control. I get that.

Hmmm, now what stupid move can I do next?